Lifestyles
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Why We Lunch
By Simone Ellin
“Ladies who lunch”…“Power Lunch”…“Let’s do lunch”… “There’s no free lunch!”
All of these catch phrases beg the questions — whether, where, with whom and why — does Jewish Baltimore lunch? Here’s what our author learned.
It’s a weekday lunch hour at Stone Mill Bakery in Greenspring Station and the place is jumping. As I stand in a long line waiting for an iced coffee, I check out the scene. From business folks to moms with toddlers in tow, to chicly attired, modern-day “ladies who lunch,” it seems like just about everyone is here. In fact, the restaurant has the air of a cocktail party, with people leaving their own tables to chat it up with people on opposite ends of the restaurant. As I finally reach the counter, a cute foursome — two young mothers and their little ones — enter the bakery. Instantly I am transported back to a time some 10 or 12 years ago, when my friends Darlene, Randi and I would schlep our babies and all of their baby accoutrements to various infant classes (music, gymnastics, mommy-and-me, etc.), sometimes to the mall (we always regretted this) and, of course, out to lunch. Lunch and the activities that preceded it were a crucial part of our day-to-day routine.
As women who had worked out of our homes for many years, being home alone with babies was a major shocker. We could not have loved our little ones more, but having a daily structure that included friends, moral support, lots of coffee and lunch was what kept us sane.
Sometimes I enjoyed those lunches so much, I wondered what I had done to deserve this life of leisure. Post-lunch, it was back to reality, as I tried to persuade a shrieking, over-tired 2-year-old that it was naptime! Life of leisure — NOT!
Twelve years later, Amanda Shapiro, once my teenaged babysitter and now mother of 2-year-old Riley, can often be found at Stone Mill Bakery. “We like it because there are highchairs for the kids and outdoor space where they can play,” she explains.
Shapiro has two standing lunch dates each week with Riley and other moms and babies. On some weekdays she often shares lunch with other mothers at in-home gatherings. Although she is a native Baltimorean, with many friendships from childhood, Shapiro says her regular lunch dates are with women she met in her Shalom Baby (Jewish Lamaze) classes.
“Lunch is definitely a way of getting us out of the house,” says Shapiro. “It’s mom time, a time when you can have some adult conversation, but with the kids,” she adds. “Well — except when all the kids suddenly start screaming and throwing food, and playing with the salt shakers. You know.”
Like Shapiro, Karen Shuster, also 30-years-old and the mother of 14-month-old Isabella, and her friends use lunch as a social opportunity for themselves and their youngsters. Pre-motherhood, when Shuster worked downtown, she made it a priority to get out of her office for lunch. One of Shuster’s favorite downtown eateries was Mount Vernon Stable, where she could frequently be found talking with the restaurant’s owner while enjoying some one-on-one time with her mother or chatting with colleagues.
Baby Isabella’s arrival changed all that. Thereafter, lunch took on a whole new meaning. Isabella (Izzie, as she’s frequently called) was born with a congenital heart defect known as VSD (ventricular septal defect). The defect was successfully repaired when Izzy was 4-months-old, but the baby wasn’t able to be around other children while she recovered.
“We couldn’t go to ‘mommy-and-me’ type classes when Izzy was little, so I needed to find ways to get myself out of the house and around other adults,” recalls Shuster. “It helped me to maintain a sense of normalcy.”
Nowadays, Izzy participates in Music Together classes at the Owings Mills Rosenbloom JCC, as well as weekly playgroups. “When we go to playgroup,” says Shuster, “we have lunch with the other moms and babies. Everyone brings a dish to share. Usually we meet at someone’s home, or during the summer we like to go to a pool.”
Shuster and Izzy also spend lunchtimes with other moms and babies following their weekly music classes. A favorite spot is Steve’s Deli in Owings Mills. “The babies like the mac and cheese, and they get free cookies.” Perhaps most importantly, “We can make a mess and nobody seems to mind,” she adds.
“As a stay-at-home mom, these luncheons are great for me because I get some adult contact and make some great friends” says Shuster. In fact, she has rekindled some friendships with former classmates who also have small children now. “We compare notes about the kids. Sometimes we’ll discover that our babies are ready for a food we haven’t given them yet, because they’ll eat another baby’s lunch!”
Lest you get the impression that lunch is only for the ladies, Randall Singer, a 41-year-old human resources consultant, and Keith Michel, 42, owner of Sussex Marketing Solutions, both attest to being frequent “lunchers.” While stay-at-home dads who take their tots to playgroups and out to lunch certainly exist, most men who lunch during the workweek do so without their kids. Lunch can be social or for business, but it is generally a quieter affair.
“Tarks is a good central location,” says Singer. “If you work downtown, but you’re meeting someone who is based in Northern Baltimore County, for example, it’s a good midpoint. Singer, an Owings Mills resident, sees lunch as a good opportunity for networking and career-focused relationship building. “Lunch is a time when you can have more informal conversation with a client or prospect. It lends itself to getting to know someone better.”
Although, he sometimes lunches with clients, Michel prefers not to discuss business while lunching. Like Singer, Michel feels that lunch is a perfect time for developing relationships while enjoying great food.
“Usually, I have lunch with someone else,” he says. Michel’s favorite haunt? Faidley’s at Lexington Market. “Faidley’s is a place with ‘old world Baltimore charm.’ It brings back fond memories for me, since I used to eat there with my grandmother when I was a child. It hasn’t changed a bit!”
Amanda Shapiro (left), who has two standing lunch dates a week, enjoys a meal with her son Riley, girlfriend Lisa Smolen and her son, Drew.
Randall Singer is a frequent “luncher.”
Photography by Kirsten Beckerman
